Fun

The Dog Mom Holiday Anthem Is The Only Song You Need This Season

Written by: Katie Kirnan

December 1, 2017

It’s about time there was a holiday song for dog people. T-Spoon (Katie Haller) and ZZ Tophalf (Zoe Costello) — the dog moms from the viral Mother’s Day Dog Mom Anthem — are back with a special holiday song and music video just for dog people. This time, they’re joined by MC Sharpdawg (Alexis Nelson) and a new furry friend.

No matter where you’re from, no matter what you celebrate, if you’re a dog person, you know that ’tis the season to rock a ridiculous dog sweater and spoil the HELL out of your pup. (Even more than you do the other 11 months of the year.) Full disclosure: the video you’re about to watch includes multiple dogs rockin’ booties, Doodles in their finest yarmulkes, and more matching outfits than you can count.

Share this with the dog mom that inspires you. And keep sleighing, ladies.

TO DOWNLOAD THE TRACK: Go to the playlist below, right-click the blue text to open the file in a new tab, and then hit the download arrow.

Dog Mom Holiday Anthem Track

 

Dog Mom Holiday Anthem, performed by T-Spoon and ZZ Tophalf, ft. MC Sharpdawg

CHECK OUT THE MUSIC VIDEO BELOW:

CREDITS:
Performed by: T-Spoon and ZZ Tophalf, ft. MC Sharpdawg
Written by: Katie Haller, Zoe Costello, Katie Kirnan, Alexis Nelson
Directed by: Katie Kirnan
Executive Producers: Katie Kirnan, Wheaton Simis
Produced by: Katie Kirnan, Wheaton Simis, Katie Haller, Zoe Costello, Spurgeon James + BARK
Music & Song Production: Billy Conahan
Cinematography: Wheaton Simis
Editor: Gen Liu
Colorist: Wheaton Simis
Other Links: https://www.katiehallercomedy.com https://soundcloud.com/billyconahan
Props and Products available at: BarkBox.com and BarkShop.com

TO GRAB DOG LADY SWAG: Check out the Dog Mom Holiday Collection on BarkShop.com!

LYRICS:
Yo, it’s T-Spoon
And ZZ Tophalf
We back
Ho, ho, ho!

VERSE 1:
Been a crazy dog lady since the day I was born
‘Cause every day with a dog feels like Christmas morn

I’m walking outside with my jolly good fellow
It’s a winter wonderland, gonna paint this town yellow

Fashion’s much better in the freezing cold weather
Big coat with no bra!
While she rocks her favorite sweater

Miracle on 34th Street when I’m walkin’ my dog
And he finally decides to drop that hot yule log

Booties, booties, booties, booties, walkin’ everywhere!
Yo, there’s salt on these streets, you gotta be prepared

You say the holidays are stressful, I feel bad for you, son
I got 99 problems but my dog ain’t one

CHORUS:
If you’re crazy about your dog, here’s your holiday song
Put your hands in the air if you’re a dog mom
Raise a glass to the ladies who sleigh this ride
Ring in the new year with that dog mom pride

VERSE 2:
Dress him like an elf, call him Santa’s little helper
AND DON’T FORGET TO DONATE TO YOUR LOCAL DOG SHELTER

They got the best vet in town, Dr. K’s no slacker
Neuters so many dogs they call her “The Nutcracker”!

All my Jewish Doodles sitting ’round the table
The DJ spinnin’ just like a dreidel

A treat every night when the menorah’s list
And may I just say my Bubbe’s brisket is legit

Sippin’ Manischewitz feelin’ like a boss
Now watch me dip this latke in applesauce

Fill his stocking to the top with organic duck jerky
That s–t get more stuffing than a Thanksgiving turkey

See my dog’s face? Yeah, that card’s from me
I also rock him on my mug, hat, and tree

I never have to listen to the carolers sing
‘Cause he goes freakin’ loco when that doorbell rings

CHORUS:
If you’re crazy about your dog, here’s your holiday song
Put your hands in the air if you’re a dog mom
Raise a glass to the ladies who sleigh this ride
Ring in the new year with that dog mom pride

If you’re crazy about your dog, here’s your holiday song
Put your hands in the air if you’re a dog mom
Raise a glass to the ladies who sleigh this ride
Ring in the new year with that dog mom pride

GUEST SOLO:
MC Sharpdawg here, spreading joy ‘n’ rhymes
Flows colder than my dog’s nose in the wintertime

If you think spoiling my dog ends with Santa’s sleigh
Kwanzaa starts tomorrow, We got seven more days!

You’re not supposed to give gifts, you don’t gotta tell me
But look at me, look at my dog, look at our matching dashikis

But I don’t give a what, I don’t give a yam
‘Cause in the light of the kinara, we both look glam

CHORUS:
If you’re crazy about your dog, here’s your holiday song
Put your hands in the air if you’re a dog mom
Raise a glass to the ladies who sleigh this ride
Ring in the new year with that dog mom pride

Even when they’re naughty
Those faces we can’t resist
Good boys
Bad bitches
All make the nice list

Feliz NaughtyDog
Bah HumPug
Motherpuppers.

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Written by: Katie Kirnan

December 1, 2017

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