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We Asked Dog Parents To Describe Their Dog’s Breath, And Turned Their Answers Into Perfumes

We Asked Dog Parents To Describe Their Dog’s Breath, And Turned Their Answers Into Perfumes

Anyone can tell you a dog’s breath is bad, but it takes a dog owner’s refined sense of smell to really be able to describe the complexity and nuances of the stench. We asked some people around the BARK office to put their nose to the test and come up with a perfume that best describes their dog’s dreaded mouth funk.

GARBAGE DISPOSAL by Andi

A new scent for men.

“Andi has no self control, so her breath has a robust smell of anything that was once edible or alive. There may also be subtle hints of poop. I caught her licking it once.” –Andi’s mom, Lisa

With scents of roadkill, Taco Bell Dumpster, and mold with subtle hints of feces, this cologne is sure to be a knockout.

THE MYSTERY by Gus

Unisex fragrance.

“Gus’ breath smells like the piles of dried kelp you see on beach walks. At first you’re intrigued, and as you approach you notice the trash and dead fish. He eats beef and cheese, but the essence of sea trash is palpable.” –Gus’ mom, Melissa

Starring notes of kelp, polluted sea water, and dead fish, this one-of-a-kind scent will transport you to the nearest beach and compel you to start a campaign against littering.

BORN STINKER by Stella

Organic parfum.

“Stella has always had a pungent earthiness to her breath. When her breath lingers, it starts to develop fishy notes that are probably from her food.” –Stella’s mom, Christina 

Infused with earthy aromas and a subtle fishiness, Born Stinker is the perfect combination of land and sea.

WEENIE HUT SR by Benji

Eau de toilette.

Benji’s breath has a distinct top note of kibble that is permeated by a delicate hint of saliva. Also present is the unmistakable scent of day-old hot dogs.” –Benji’s mom,

Featuring the robust scent of meaty gravy and brewed in a base of hot dog water, this fragrance will grant its wearer immediate and visceral reactions.

SUMMER HEAT by Ferg

Body mist.

“Ferg’s breath is sharp and tangy with a hint of grass and day old rotisserie chicken that has been left out in the sun.” –Ferg’s mom, Claire

This sun-ripened scent highlights the zesty qualities of sumac and the floral qualities of crabgrass, without being overpowered by the formidable aroma of aged poultry.

Does your dog’s rancid breath deserve its own perfume? We’ll do you one better—try BARK Bright to give your dog fresher breath in two weeks, whiter teeth in 4–6 weeks, and a compliment from your vet at your dog’s next check-up!

The triple-enzyme technology in Bright’s toothpaste works in tandem with the tasty dental sticks to scrape away plaque buildup, and break down plaque-causing debris long after your pup’s done chewing. Get your first month’s Bright Dental Kit today with this link!

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