I was out for my morning walk with my pup, nothing out of the ordinary, just us two girls still blinking sleepily, when Her Highness finally found a suitable area of ground upon which to drop her first deuce of the day. I wrapped a bag around my hand and bent over to lose my dignity pick up the considerable amount of waste my lovely dog had left for me to collect like the lowly peasant she makes me feel like I am. And that’s when I felt it — the bag had a hole in it, through which my dog’s poop made contact with my bare skin. I swear I could hear her cackle as a low “Noooooooo” escaped my lips.
So here’s how you can avoid being that person who’s totally unprepared to deal with the unexpected stuff that comes with being a dog owner.
1. Poop Bags
. Preferably with no holes in them because reasons. Reusing plastic grocery bags and empty bread bags is a popular option, but it also leaves you vulnerable to the dreaded holey bag. If you invest in good quality poop bags, the Holey Bag Curse will never strike.
2. Wet Wipes
. Sometimes, no matter what bag you use, poop just wants to travel places on its own like that’s cool. It’s not. So wet wipes can come in handy in a pinch when no water is available. Having them with you is always a good idea, because you can use them to wipe paws or clean up a sudden bout of the runs, and you’re well-equipped to handle any messes that might happen. Because dogs are like babies: they get crap everywhere.
3. Hand Sanitizer
. While sharing bacteria with your dog might not be a bad thing, certain little nasties like E. coli can cause problems no one has time to deal with. Hand sanitizer is great to use as a followup to wet wipes if you’ll be outside with your dog and don’t have soap and a sink handy.
. Maybe your dog escapes on a walk (Dog forbid) and their recall isn’t so great. Maybe you want to reward good behavior when you pass another dog on the street and your dog doesn’t go full out Cujo on them. Whatever the reason, treats are great to keep on hand at all times.
5. Liquid Bandage
. While there is no substitute for veterinary care, sometimes pups get small cuts that don’t require stitches. Liquid bandages are great for when your pup needs to mend his scratches in no time.
6. Lint Roller
. Keep some lint rollers right by your door for a quick touchup before you leave the house. Because there’s no way you’re going to make it out of your place without picking up fur on your clothes.
7. Extra Leash
. It’s great to have an extra leash at home or stashed in the car, especially if you have a pup who likes to run for the hills at any chance he gets (I’m looking at you, derpy Boxer in the picture above). You never know when something might happen to the leash you have, or when you might encounter a stray pup that needs help finding his family.