Welcome to Bark After Dark, a series of hilarious but slightly unusual articles we post in the wee hours of the morning for you
weirdos night owls. Not for the faint of heart, weak of stomach, or low of humor. Enjoy!
Let’s just cut to the chase…
1. The Original
From what I can gather, Consome Panchi, a potato chip dealer/ dog mutant is trying to make his heartbroken, best buddy feel better. Consome pulls out all the stops for this kid. He dances, he puts puts pants on his head (and a mask on his crotch), he does something else with paddles – either way, the child gets back together with his girlfriend. Great.
2. Take Me Out To Ball Game
Unless, of course, Consome Panchi will be there, lying like Burt Reynolds on a bear skin rug. He wants to play catch, but winds up getting in a fight with a Corgi on a stick. I did crave BBQ chips after watching this, however. You won this time, Consome.
3. He’s Back
This time with a comb over. And acting a little too handsy, if you ask me.
3. Wait, what.
Welp, the monster’s at another sporting event, rocking that seductive pose again. Yadda, yadda, yadda… Consome Panchi tries to teach a little girl to fly and gets abducted by aliens.
4. Dancing With The Dogs
(sigh) I don’t know anymore, you guys. Consome goes to a dark place in this one. He seems to have shifted his focus from chips to dance. So he’s officially lost me.