No matter how long it’s been since we left middle school, there’s no denying that dogs keep us young. Maybe it’s all the poop or the derpy moments, or maybe it’s the fact that dog parents need to have a sense of humor to deal with some of the mishaps that come with sharing a home with a dingus dog. Whatever it is, our pups keep us laughing.
Here are 13 ridiculous dog toys that will give you the inappropriate giggles.
1. Brownie The Happy Poo Dog Toy, $12
As far as I’m concerned, the poop emoji was made exclusively for dog owners. How else can you convey how much of your dog’s poop you pick up in a day?
2. Silly Bums, $7
Whoever designed this probably did so with the sheer intention of filling dog homes across the world with butts. We had a few of these laying around the office and it never got old seeing a pup saunter by with a buttcheek in its mouth.
3. Plushstache Dog Toy, $14
Yes, quite. Give your pup a distinguished sir-like look with this plushy mustache that will make all the hipsters at the dog park jealous. Way to look dapper af, doge.
4. Grrrona Beer Dog Toy, $14-16
After a long hard day of lazing around, your dog deserves to have a nice beer. This plush toy even comes with a “lime” sticking out of the bottle for an authentic look. This item is part of a line of other alcoholic beverages turned into squeaky toys, including “Bad Spaniels” and “HeinieSniff’n.”
5. Stogies Fetch Stick, $9-10
“Yeah, see? Hand over the money, see?” This toy will make your dog look like an old-timey gangster with a cigar sticking out of the corner of its mouth. Pair it with the Plushstache for a distinguished look.
6. Rogz Grinz Treat Ball, $9.95
This treat ball bounces, floats, and looks dogdamn ridiculous in your dog’s mouth. Seriously, there’s no way to keep a straight face when watching your dog fetch this and run back to you with a wide toothy grin.
7. The Dognald, $16
Your pup might not give a gosh darn about pawlitics, but that doesn’t mean they won’t love tousling The Dognald’s messy hair. The red locks sticking out of his head need some taming, and who better to give him a nice sloppy ‘do than your dog?
8. Hillary Kitten, $16
Now you can host your own pawlitical debates at home with the Hillary Kitten squeaky toy. Armed with a pantsuit and a smartphone in her pocket, Hillary is tough and sturdy.
9. KONG Binkie, $7-9
If you’re the type to put a baby onesie on your pup at night and refer to your dog as your baby, complete the fantasy with this KONG Binkie that doubles as a pacifier and treat dispenser. Your pup will love throwing it around to get the treats out and you’ll die laughing when your pup runs up to you looking like a big baby with a binkie in its mouth.
10. Bearded Lady, $9-13
Legend has it that the Bearded Lady dog toy is named after BarkBox cofounder Carly. Whatever the case, this magnificently bearded dog toy is perfect for snugglin’ and cuddlin’.
11. Humunga Bling, $12
If you’ve ever had dreams of turning your dog into a rapper with grills on their teeth, look no further. With the Humunga Bling dog toy, you’ll get a serious case of the giggles every time your dog turns around flashing his bling at you, dawg.
12. Humunga Tongue, $12
This ridiculously long tongue toy reminds me of that brief time in 2000 when everyone answered their phone like this: